Delirium

*BLEEP! BLEEP BLEEP! BLEEP!*

I groaned and opened my eyes. I stared at the blank white ceiling above me half asleep. Suddenly, I panicked.

I had no idea where I was.

Where the heck was I?
I squinted and looked around the room. I could see some scrubs lying on the floor beside my bed. Scrubs? Right. Those were there because I think they're mine. I see myself wearing them. I think I'm a vet.

I must have gone to vet school. I went to school in Saskatoon. Am I in Saskatoon?
Somehow, I knew I wasn't.

I must have graduated.

Maybe I was back in Calgary! I thought harder. I remembered being in a busy place with lots of people and cars yesterday. But it wasn't Calgary.

Edmonton?

No, I think I was there years ago. I can't be there now.

I thought harder and became more confused. I remembered graduating and moving somewhere. where? Toronto? No, can't be.

And then it came to me.

New York. I was in New York.

I am currently working as an intern in New York.

And my alarm was beeping, meaning I was due to wake up to go to work again.

@#$%.


In the past week, I have been working 14 hour days with the occasional 20 hour shift thrown in to keep it interesting. I was banking a max of 5 hours of sleep a night and pulling a nasty ER shift again. To top it off, it was labour day and because of the long weekend, it was even nastier than usual.

I guess the lack of sleep was finally catching up to me.

I woke up and pulled on a clean pair of scrubs and cursed at myself for the millionth time for having signed up for this #$@%. What the hell was i thinking?

The streets were devoid of traffic for once as I drove to work and I pulled in to my usual parking spot. I entered the hospital and looked around. Mass chaos surrounded me.

Charts were lined up at the door, the waiting room was full of irate clients while what few assistants and technicians we had on the holiday shift were loaded up holding three animals a piece.

Our board of in house patients was filled to the max and extra sheets of paper were taped up to accommodate all the names. All the cages were filled and every piece of equipment was being utilized to the max. The phone was ringing and somewhere on the overhead, I could hear "ER doctor to the ICU STAT. Available ER doctor to the ICU STAT."

I barely had time to set down my purse and throw my stethoscope around my neck before I was swept up in it all.

Finally, by the time I left at 2:45am, we only had one patient left to see and a zillion charts of unfinished paperwork. I sat down to type and instantly fell asleep at the keyboard.

"@#$% it. I'm coming in tomorrow to finish this stuff. It can wait."

And so I went in again this morning for my regular intern lecture and to finish my stupid paperwork.

I am finally home now and need to cram some vital book learning into me before I start my internal medicine rotation tomorrow. Yuck.

Did I mention I also need to sleep?

There's a squirrel outside my bedroom window that's taunting me and chattering up and storm.

I hope he's really there.