Always look on the night side of life

Just when you don't think things can get worse, they often do.

My roommate's grandmother passed away this week and just to illustrate how inhumane it is, our program only allows us three days of bereavement and then we are expected to return full force to work or else we don't get paid.

Oh, and did I mention that for those three days, if you are on an emergency shift, you have to get someone to cover for you and you have to make up that shift later on?

My poor roommate decided she'd just suck it up and do her emergency shift not even a day after the funeral and I got the pleasure of working with her last night.

She spent the moments between clients sobbing her eyes out in the intern office and then dropping the F bomb in the ICU going "I CAN'T DO THIS! I CAN'T F*CKING DO THIS!" and meanwhile, because for some bizarre reason, whenever she's on overnights we get slammed so things kept coming in. By the end of the night, our desks looked like stacks of files from the zillion patients we saw.
My shift was supposed to end at midnight but naturally, I was there till 6:45am.

At 4am, we decided to head out for some McDonald's. That kept me going for a little longer but eventually, I gave up after falling asleep on my ophtho patient's file and drooling on it.

We also randomly had a slew of exotics come in and ferrets, parrots, rats and all else aside, it was an insane night.

I am due to go back in another two hours meaning I need to shower and somehow get some normal food into me by then. Something not carb-loaded and deep fried even though that sounds scrumptious.

I also almost got into a cat fight with one of the surgery technicians. That was always fun. The last thing a bitter, crazy, sleep-deprived, super -stressed and beat-on intern needs is some bitter jealous technician picking on them.

Fortunately for her, I was holding a Boston terrier with an eye that was about the explode in one hand and a very expensive piece of ophtho equipment in the other. And also my fellow intern mate came and talked me out of it and guided me into the surgery area to finish my ophtho exam.
Oh but if it weren't for that there would have been some blood spilt. Likely mine seeing as the tech was about 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, probably PMSing and was holding some sharp dental equipment at the time.

Not two hours after that, I was told by some clients that I was a very nice young lady and that I should tell my parents they did a good job on me.
I think they were patronizing me but whatever.
Can't help the fact that despite the recent sagging and wrinkles on my face and bags under my eyes, I still look like I'm a 12 year old with a stethoscope and a white coat playing doctor.

Sigh.

Which brings me to the final part of my blog.
The part I always end with which is WHAT THE F*CK AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!

Gabriel and I went to the American Museum of Natural History on my one day off and it was fabulous. It made me remember how much I love biology though.

If only there were some job where I could travel around the world marvelling at how amazing it is and sharing that with other people. Perhaps I could be the next David Attenborough or Steve Irwin or David Suzuki.

Oh great, the white trash neighbors are arguing again. I can hear them through the kitchen walls. Did I mention that his new thing isn't selling the weed so much as it's about selling rusty scraps of metal which he bashes up in my yard at all hours of the day?

Magically, I've been so tired from being on overnights that Ive been able to sleep through it lately. Unfortunately, that means I've been tired enough to mismanage some of my ICU patients and have the surgical resident berate me in the morning at 10am after a 14 hour shift and a 2 hour meeting about pancreatitis that I wanted to kill myself during.

This can't possibly be right.

Anyhow, I should go. This is just getting bitter.
I sound like a horrid emo song that just won't end.

Hopefully, tonight will not be that bad.
Yeah right.